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Tuesday, June 30, 2009

So Fun To Be a Malaysian....


NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR HAIR LOSS:
Maggi Mee.

NATIONAL EXCUSE FOR BEING LATE:
Traffic Jam.

NATIONAL CONDOM:
None. Most Malaysians still feel embarrassed buying condoms. So they rush into a 7-11, hurriedly grab the nearest pack, any pack, pay and leave before the cashier can even blink an eye.

NATIONAL FRUIT FOR INDUCING MENSTRUATION:
Pineapple

NATIONAL APHRODISIAC DRINK:
Stout. Many swear by it.
But after a few pints they start
swearing at everything...

NATIONAL FAKE ILLNESS FOR GETTING MC (MEN):
Food Poisoning.

NATIONAL FAKE ILLNESS FOR GETTING MC (WOMEN):
Menstrual Pain

NATIONAL EXCUSES GIVEN BY WOMEN WHEN REFUSING SEX:
Headache, kids not asleep, maid not asleep, mother-in-law around, early appointment, period, haven't removed make-up, haven't had a shower, no water supply, going to watch 'Desperate Housewives', depressed, no mood, etc...

NATIONAL EXCUSES GIVEN BY MEN WHEN REFUSING SEX:
None. Malaysian men never refuse sex. (oh ya??)

NATIONAL CURE FOR HEADACHES:
Panadol. The 'cure for all'. If it fails we have another secret weapon;
Tiger Balm.

NATIONAL CURE FOR DIZZINESS:
Minyak Angin Cap Kapak.

NATIONAL CAUSE OF DIZZINESS (FOR YUPPIES):
Happy Hours.

NATIONAL INSTANT CURE FOR DIZZINESS (FOR YUPPIES):
The sight of a police roadblock.

NATIONAL RUBBISH DUMP:
Anywhere. As long as it is not your house.


NATIONAL MOST MIS-PRONOUNCED NAME:
Carrefour. Sometimes even pronounced as Carry 4!
On second thought, why bother pronouncing stupid French brands like Peugeot, Renault or Citroen correctly. I think it sounds better,when the local mechanics say 'Pew Jeot'. When I was in school, Milo was always 'MeeLo', now that I'm sophisticated, I say 'My Lo'. So don't be embarassed saying 'Carry 4' when the ! Mat Sallehs shamelessly pronounce orang utan as 'rangootan'.

NATIONAL ROADSIDE DISTRACTION:
The Bra-less Tourist. See how heads turn and traffic slows down when a bra-less Mat Salleh backpacker goes 'bouncing' about on the streets.

mr.Bean!!!! (hilarious..)


1) MR. BEAN SEES A DOCTOR :
Doctor : I regret to tell you that you have a brain tumor.
Mr. Bean: Yesss!!! (jumps in joy)
Doctor : Did you understand what I just told you?
Mr. Bean: Yes of course, do you think I'm dumb?
Doctor : Then why are you so happy?
Mr. Bean: Because that proves that I have a brain!

2) MR. BEAN WHILE IN GRADE SCHOOL:
Teacher : What is 5 plus 4?
Mr. Bean : 9
Teacher : What is 4 plus 5?
Mr. Bean : Are you trying to fool me, you've just
twisted the figure, the answer is 6!!

3) WHILE IN A DRUG STORE:
Mr. Bean: I'd like some vitamins for my grandson.
Clerk : Sir, vitamin A, B or C?
Mr. Bean: Any will do, my grandson doesn't know the alphabet yet!!

4) AT AN ATM MACHINE:
Friend : What are you looking at?
Mr. Bean: I know your PIN no., hee, hee.
Friend : Alright, what is my PIN no. if you saw it?
Mr. Bean: four asterisks (****)!

5) MARRIAGE:
Friend : How many women do you believe must a man marry?
Mr. Bean: 16
Friend : Why?
Mr. Bean: Because the priest says 4 richer, 4 poorer, 4 better and 4 worse.

6) CHATTING WITH HIS FRIEND:
Friend : How was the tape you borrowed from me, is it Ok?
Mr. Bean: What do you mean ok, I thought it's a horror film. I didn't see any picture.
Friend : What tape did you take anyway?
Mr. Bean: Head Cleaner.

7) DEATH OF HIS MOTHER:
Mr. Bean:(crying) the doctor called, Mom's dead.
Friend : condolence, my friend.
(After 2 minutes) Mr. Bean cries even louder
Friend : what now?
Mr. Bean: my sister just called, her mom died too!

8) MR. BEAN ATTENDING A MEETING:
Colleague : Sorry I'm late. I got stuck in an elevator for 4 hrs because of a power failure.
Mr. Bean : That's alright, me too...I got stuck on the escalator for 3 hrs.

9) SPELLING LESSON:
Mr. Bean's Son: Dad, what is the spelling of successful.. ..is it one c or two c?
Mr. Bean : Make it three c to be sure!

Monday, June 29, 2009

lookin' 4 da rite word...


aloha....hye everyone!!!
ni nad la...xlme lg nad nk blik penang dh...ari2 nad dh g penang jp cz sent my 'big2 stuff' 2 our new,old,rent house there...so nnt blk xyh la nad nk heret menatang yg besa 2...nek tren kot..lg ssh...mlm lak 2...smpi pg...cmni la idp sorng studnt yg merantau from one place 2 another...i'ts seem fun but let me tell 'ya it so hard...cmne pn ktorng still leh survive la..xdela truk sgt sbnrnye..ktorng pn xmnjekn diri...blaja rse ssh kt tmpt org...kne berdikari...get suit 2 da environment...lg pn kte ade kwn kn....hehehehh
i hav sumthing...njy it k...
hav 2 go now....
bye2.......


ERTI KAWAN

Bacalah...

1) kawan tu bkn mcm main FUTSAL.
Mula-mula kejar.. dah dapat sepak..

2) kawan tu bkn mcm main SKATE.
Mula-mula gosok..lepas tu pijak...

3) kawan tu bkn mcm main RAGBI.
Mula-mula tangkap.. dah dapat tendang..

4) kawan tu bknnya mcm PAMPERS..
dah pakai, buang..

5) kawan tu bknnya mcm BARANG KEMAS.
Waktu baru beli pakai. Dah sengkek gadai.

6) kawan tu bkn mcm PELANGI. Hari cerah
takde..hujan gerimis baru muncul..

7) kawan tu bkn mcm KERETA.
Rosak skit,jual.. ambik kereta baru..

8) kawan tu bkn mcm CHIPSMORE..
kejap ade kejap takde..

9) kawan tu bkn mcm BANK.
Bila dah takde duit,pegi kat sana ambik.

10)lagi.....kawan tu mcm ape ye????
Haa..kawan tu mcm AWAK LA. .
bila saya hantar msg,
awak akan baca msg saya dgn teliti sampai habis.

Walau ape pun tanggapan org tentang kawan..
bagi saya, kawan tu penting.

Seorang kawan takkan biarkan kawan dia menangis,
sedih, berduka dan sebagainya.

Kawan yg sejati adalah seorang kawan yang dapat diajak duduk dan berbincang tentang pelbagai perkara.

Yang penting, seorang kawan akan sentiasa menghadiahkan senyuman kpd kawan-kawannya..

Sunday, June 28, 2009

ats permintaan org....



hye...
aku ni...hahahahah..
ats permintaan org yg bnyk meyupport aku(new vocab k)aku xnk r cte psl aku dgn ehemm2 2...hahahhahaha...biar la ktorng simpn sndiri..heheeheh...lgpn xdela gmpk mne pn...bese je...tp btw cte transformers mmg best pn...tgk r sndiri k...aku skng still kt umah lg...dduk menunggu mse utk blk ke penang..mim aku dh bli tkt blk penang tau...1hb 8mlm...dun be late k...ari ni ari isnin yg normal...pg yg cm bese tp pale otk aku ni yg lua bese...memikir mslh yg bkl dtg bertan-tan xlme lg...b4 aku nk chow ni, aku juz nk share sumthing dgn korng...klu ade mse bce la k....jd renungan kte sme2...
heheheeheh...hope u njy k...


Kata Mak,
Kwn 2 ibarat lebah,
Abis madu sepah dibuang...

Kata Ayah,
Kwn 2 umpama bunga ros,
Dipandang cantik,
Dipegang sakit...

Kata Atuk,
Kwn 2 seperti air,
Terus mengalir...

Kata Nenek,
Kwn tu bak bulan,
Dipuja dan disanjung,
Tapi nun jauh di sana...

Kate Sedare,
Kawan tu macam makanan,
Kawan makan kawan...

Kata Abang,
Kawan tu seperti lembu,
Mengikut saje ape dikata...

Kata Kakak,
Kawan tu tak ubah macam durian,
Bau je busuk,
Tapi sedap dimakan...

Kata Adik,
Kawan tu macam biskut,
Kejap ade kejap takde...

Kata Aku,
Kawan tu tak kisahlah camner,
Walaupun dier...
IBARAT LEBAH,
UMPAMA BUNGA ROS,
SEPERTI AIR,
BAK BULAN,
MACAM MAKANAN,
SEPERTI LEMBU,
TAK UBAH MACAM DURIAN,
MACAM BISKUT,
Dier tetap kawan...

Tw x sebab ape?
Skali aku dah kawan ngan dier,
Selamenyer dier tetap kawan aku,
Itu cara aku berkawan...

Walaupun kita ader kekasih,
Tapi,
Teman tetap paling setia...

Walaupun kita punyai harta yang banyak,
Teman tetap paling berharga...

Friday, June 26, 2009

what should I write???


haloooo...
agk lme r aku xupdate menatang nie...dr bi jd bm,dr blom practikal smpi abs praktkl...
hahhhhahahahha...
lme2...4 a start,i realy dun know what 2 say....lme x ash pale otk aku ni dgn bnde2 ni...ayt pn cm dh basi jer...tp ble tgk my besties SYAMIM JANNAH SHAIFUL BAHARI sokmo update blog die, aku pn cm xcited lak tbe2 nk update blog...kononnyeee....hehehehh...u r my inspiration darl..ok, mne aku nk start ek???
blur doe...
help me find sumthing great 2 talk 'bout...klu mim 2 mmg r byk cte die bleh tls..
asyk megebang je..tp aku ni len skit..x cm die
hehehehehe....
kji gle...mim lpk k...aku jokin' bai...aku pn xtau nk tls ape ni...tumpul btul otk aku...nnt ble idea aku dh berlambak aku tls byk2 k...dun 4get 2 komen my post ni...
i'll be waiting...
cm desperate je bnyiknyer...
whateva...
chow...